35 Funny Hat Puns & Jokes To Try On For Size

The target of some funny hat puns and jokes

Having some funny hat puns or jokes handy is critical. It can be a great way of poking fun at your friend who insists on wearing something outlandish, or a subtle way of pestering someone who won’t take off their hat at the dinner table.

Hats are kind of goofy if you think about it. They started as a garment that was designed to protect our giant noggins from the sun, and turned into a fashion statement over time.

Or just a way for people to hide their hair situation.

Whatever the case may be, hat puns and hat jokes are hilarious. You can decide to be a real pest with them or simply take your friends by surprise for the sake of a random laugh.

We have a couple chronic hat-wearers in our office on Madison Avenue and they have now become our favorite targets.

We’re having fun with these. We hope you do too!

  • At the zoo they have a special section of lions who wear hats. They call it the Dandy Lion exhibit. 
  • A magician in Las Vegas has a most unusual act. He pulls his top hat out of a bunny. 
  • Why were the five Mexicans sad? They were all wearing somber-eros.
  • When told the Academy Awards was going old school and every presenter had to wear a top hat, which presenter bowed out? Anne Anne Hat – away! 
  • Why do many people who wear hats have terrible haircuts? Because they refuse to take their hats off for anyone. 
  • Paleontologists have just discovered a new dinosaur that wore cowboy boots and a cowboy hat.  They are calling it a Tyrannosaurus Tex. 
  • Why were people at public executions required to wear a hat? Because when the guillotine came down they would be properly decapitated.
  • What’s a good way to avoid being sad? Imagine a rhinoceros trying to wear a hat. 
  • What’s another name for a computer hacker? A black hat. 
  • What do you call a man who goes outside without a hat? A hot head. 
  • What did the hat say to the tie? You can hang around if you want, I’m going on a head. 
  • Why did the pants on pilgrims frequently fall down? They wore their belt buckle on their hat. 
  • Why did the bell ringer wear a can on his head on Christmas? He said it was a merry can. 
  • Science has at long answered the question who wears the largest hats. Those who have the largest heads. 
  • Why did the sailing shop sell so few hats? Because their hats keps cap-sizing.
  • Why do Jewish people wear yarmulkes? Because some of them are cheap and the propellers at the top cost extra. 
  • What do the simplers thinkers have in common? They think nothing more than the hat on their head. 
  • Who’s the best tennis player in the world? Many hat lovers say it’s Roger Fedora. 
  • Why does a hat think it’s better than a bra? A bra has twice as much to lift while a hat goes on ahead. 
  • What’s another name for Manhattan? The village of crazy hat people.
  • Where do frogs who go to school stash their coats and hats? In the croak room. 
  • An auto company developed a new car where the trunk of the car looks like the bill of a baseball cap.  They call it a hat-chback! 
  • Why are hats coming back in style? Because the price of rogaine is out of this world. 
  • How much is a toupe asked the salesmen? “$400” the salesman replied. “I’ll pass,” said the man. “A hat makes a better toupee and can be bought for $20”. 
  • Why did the city require every person with disabilities to wear a hat? So that the public could see that they were handi – capped. 
  • Why does our best hockey player wear a hat not a helmet? He wants to score a hat-trick. 
  • “What’s the country with the most hats?” asked a student. “You should know this,” said the teacher, “Hatiti!” 
  • Why are people using hat tags on social media but nobody is buying hats? 
  • An ex-nun continues to wear a hat and a nun outfit when out and about. When asked why she said it’s a habit I picked up. 
  • What do you call a hat that is frequently online? A cyber-hat. 
  • On my birthday my friend gave me a bowler hat. It didn’t work though. My bowling average is still terrible. 
  • Scientists have developed a new hat that allows you to communicate your thoughts telepathically.  They call it a chatbox. 
  • India has a new politician who always wears a baseball cap. His name is Mahatma Gandhi. 
  • A group of students was in the computer lab and their instructor chided them for not taking their hats off. They replied they couldn’t. The caps lock was on. 

Try These On Your Friends!

We hope you had a good time reading these hat puns and hat jokes. They were surprisingly fun to collect, and we’ve been using these on our hat-wearing friends for the last couple of weeks!

Memorize a few of these and wait for your opportunity. It won’t be long before you’re able to use them!

As always, let us know if you have any hat puns and jokes that you think deserve a place on our list. We meticulously review everything that gets sent our way, but if your suggestion meets our extremely high quality standards we’ll add it as soon as possible.