Ah yes, nothing like a dying industry to make fun of. Theatre jokes and puns are still funny now, but it won’t be long until kids are asking you “what’s a movie theatre?” and giving you a complete existential crisis.
The smell of old popcorn (or the stinky person sitting next to you). The cramped seats. The people who always talk during important parts of the story.
There’s really nothing like it, so enjoy these while you can.
While it’s kind of random, there are plenty of clever puns and jokes about the theatre out there. We were actually pretty surprised!
That made putting this list together a lot of fun.
Enjoy!
- What did the thief steal on the theatre’s opening night? The spotlight.
- We should’ve guessed the failed postman wouldn’t be any better at delivering his acting lines.
- Everyone was spot on, you really did make a great theatre lighting tech.
- Thankfully, not too many thieves are interested in acting on stage. They’d surely steal the show.
- When the theatre owner dies, his visitation hours are as follows: 1pm, 3pm, 6:30 pm, 9pm, and midnight.
- The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn’t have the guts for it.
- Show your popcorn and coke guy at the movies a little appreciation. After all, he makes a lot of concessions.
- I’m so excited about the upcoming interactive theatre pun show. I do love to play on words.
- A blonde rushes to the ticket counter for a showing of Legally Blonde, but the cashier reminds her she just bought a ticket less than a minute ago. She says, “I know, but some idiot just tore it in half as I was about to enter.”
- I just got fired from my theatre job. I guess I should’ve made a bigger scene about it.
- When I bumped into this lady coming out of the theatre, she was kind enough to recommend I watch out man, but the ticket clerk can’t seem to find any showing for me. Go figure.
- The concession stand seems to continually be out of my favorite candy, but I always have a couple of Twix up my sleeve.
- Great news! I’m a movie director now! I gave stellar directions to a very lovely family on their way to the theatre.
- I’d love to go see the new production, “Theatre Puns,” but all the reviews say it’s just a very bad play on words.
- Why are there so many ghosts haunting the theatres? They can’t wait to boo the performance.
- I hate farmers-only nights at the theatre. They always have plenty of tomatoes and know just how to moo you off stage.
- I tried to come up with a funny theatre joke, but it was all just an act.
- Leave it to the theatrics of a theatre cast to tell performers to break a leg when they’re already cast.
- This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with “orn,” Reel your mind back in…we’re talking popcorn!
- Don’t worry if any of the actors desperately fall through the theatre floor. It’s just a stage they’re going through.
- If you want to write punning dialogue, you’ll need to write your play on words.
- Don’t theater jokes always seem so staged?
- A prankster played a really dark and dim-witted joke at the theatre. He turned off the lights.
- My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he’d waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
- The local movie theatre was robbed last night, and the thief got away with five thousand dollars in merchandise. Authorities are still trying to figure out how the thief managed to carry the two popcorns, two drinks, and two candies from the crime scene.
- It may just be a stage I’m going through, but I sure do love the trapdoors on set.
- My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn’t Happy.
- All theatres love to see scarecrows out in the audience as reviewers! They’re simply outstanding in their field.
- Why didn’t Iron Man attend the opening of The Man In The Iron Mask? He was afraid he’d steel the show.
- I’m coming out of the closet to tell everyone I was just hired as a seamstress for the theatre.
- If you don’t focus on learning your lines for the production, I shutter to imagine what the reviewers will snap about.
- Theatre costumes must be handled with care since they’re often laced with something.
- Theatre … the one place it doesn’t pay to read between the lines.
- Why do thespians have great hair? They want the perfect part.
- Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew – They’re always giving props to the actors.
- I read an amazing book about how to get into a movie theatre without paying. Naturally, I looked the author up to read more. Sadly, the next book was an autobiography about spending several years in prison.
- I wonder why theatres are so sad? They’re always dark, moody, and in tiers.
- An old man was sprawled out across several seats in the theatre. The usher politely asked him to move to his assigned seat, but he didn’t. Impatient, the usher told the old man that he’d have to call the manager if he didn’t stop taking up so many seats. The man slurred out, “I can’t.” Assuming he was drunk, the usher called the manager. The manager says, “what’s your name?” The man replied, “Fred, I think.” The manager asked, “where are you from, Fred?” “The balcony,” he replied.
Did You Enjoy This Play On Words?
These theatre jokes and theatre puns are clever, entertaining, and just downright funny. We’ve been sharing them with our friends and family and they’ve become addicted too!
If you’re a fan of the theatre and have some good jokes that you think we should include, send them our way! We go through a lot of these when we compile everything so there’s a good chance we’ve seen it already, but if you have something good that we missed we’ll definitely add it.
