51 Clever Shoe Puns & Jokes For You To Run With

An awesome piece of footwear for shoe puns and jokes

Funny shoe puns and jokes can be used pretty much anywhere. After all, what sort of monster doesn’t wear shoes?

Not only that, but these puns are pretty darn clever. Even if they received some groans at first, you’ll know it’s just because people are mad that they didn’t use them first.

And that just means you can use them even more!

We had a great time putting together this list of shoe puns and shoe jokes. We’ve been saying these around the office for weeks now (who are we kidding, we don’t have an office).

  • Why does food always taste better at the shoe store? They are sole full of shoes
  • Why did they call the cops on the guy wearing flip flops? They thought he was a clef-toe-maniac
  • The entire church took off their shoes and raised them over their heads. The priest said he was going to heel all before him. 
  • What is the most sole crushing job in the world? The guy destroying old shoes at the city dump.
  • What did the gravestone say for the buried shoe? May your sole rest in peace. 
  • What is that inside your shoe? Oh, that’s just my foot!
  • What is everyone’s shoe if they were the same size? Two feet.
  • What are the only shoes that scare Captain Hook? Crocs, they eat up his feet!
  • If you can’t tie your shoes where do you go to learn? Boot camp
  • Why are shoe puns so much better than any other type of joke? They let you run with them.
  • What are the greatest feet known to man? Trying to fit into a size 3 shoe.
  • Right from the start, they left nobody doubting their affection for one another, because they were sole mates.
  • What is the favorite shoe of thieves? Sneakers
  • What did the leg say to the shoe after they met? Can’t you jump on foot?
  • Why did everyone think the shoe builder and his lady friend were perfect for each other? They thought they were sole mates.
  • Why did the shoe builder stop taking clients after his relationship ended? He was still heeling
  • Why did he absolutely refuse to walk a mile in her shoes? Her feet were three sizes smaller than his own.
  • Why should you never buy shoes from a drug dealer? You don’t know what he laces the shoes with, I don’t want to be tripping on those shoes.
  • How do you know God is a shoe repairman? He spends all his time saving the soles of the people.
  • What philosopher had the best footwear of all time? Sockrates of course, he was a real shoe in.
  • Why did the guy who couldn’t dance only buy his shoes from the clearance bin? It was the only place he could buy two matching left shoes.
  • A customer asked for golf shoes, then switched to soccer shoes, then back to golf shoes. Which shoes did they bring out to him? They brought flip-flops!
  • What is nearly a foot long, sounds just like a sneeze, and comes in leather? A shoe.
  • What type of shoe is best to keep all the flys away? Open toad shoes! 
  • What animal never takes off their shoes? A horse.
  • Why do shoe builders always get into heaven? They have the best soles.
  • What kind of shoes do plumbers hate the most? Clogs, they stick on them. 
  • Why does the news always report when a shoe factory burns down? Because hundreds of soles are ruined.
  • Why did the student tie his shoelaces with all the other students? They wanted to go on a classroom trip together.
  • What is the only type of shoes a car salesman would sell? Vans, they ride so smooth.
  • Why was the shoe repairman confused when the boy asked to repair the hole in his shoe? Because that was the hole to put your foot into!
  • What was the reason the robot went inside the shoe shop? He needed to get rebooted!
  • Why can’t Santa Claus wear any shoes? He has nothing but missile toes.
  • What brand of shoes do artists use? Sketchers.
  • Why did the man start eating his shoes? Because he liked sole food.
  • What did one shoe say to the pretty shoe? Shoe la la. 
  • What are Imams shoes made out of? They are created from Allah gaiter skins!
  • I accidentally stepped into some gum in the playground, ever since then I don’t stop sole searching.
  • Why did the little brother wear a shoe on his head? He wanted to be a foot taller like his brother!
  • What were the last words of the shoe that wasn’t lost? I am the last sole survivor!
  • What did the shoe say to the talkative shoe? Don’t make me put a sock in it, buddy!
  • Why do shoes avoid tents? Because they don’t want to go to boot camp!
  • How do you find out if a shoe is an athletic shoe? It does not matter, you just gotta run with it.
  • Why was the employee upset with the gift he got from his boss? The gift they gave him was the boot!
  • What type of shoes do ghosts like to wear? They like the booooooots. 
  • What foot is impossible to find a shoe for? A square foot!
  • What type of shoe do you make from a banana? A slipper!

Were These Good For Your Sole?

We hope you enjoyed our list of shoe puns and jokes. This list was a lot of fun to put together!

Like we said, there are plenty of opportunities for you to use these on a daily basis. Shoes are everywhere, so you never need an excuse!

Let us know if there are any other shoe jokes or shoe puns that you think we missed. If your suggestions are good we’ll make sure to add them to the list above!