Although it might surprise you, window jokes and window puns are actually quite funny! When we started putting this list together we weren’t sure what to expect, but the results really cracked us up!
Take a moment to look at these great window jokes and puns. We think you’re gonna like them.
- What do you get when you use water to clean the windows? Light.
- What becomes of a window covering that has exhausted its usefulness? It turns into a yawning!
- What do you call a story written about a broken window? A draft.
- Never waste a window of opportunity when you see one. They could be a real pane to replace.
- How do you make a window soundproof? You have to give it the silent treatment.
- A pigeon flew against the side of my house the other day and now I have a stained glass window in my office.
- I broke a window the other day and attempted to put in a new one by myself, but it was just such a pane.
- Words of wisdom from my grandfather: Never fight a window installer. They can really bring the pane.
- What happens when you tell a window a joke? It cracks up.
- Why did the Ninja Turtles throw Shredder out of their office window? Because they fought all the time.
- It’s easy enough to climb through the window on the first floor, but a window on the second floor? That’s an entirely different story.
- My wife and I were driving down the road today when a bug hit the windshield. Without skipping a beat, I gave her a sideways glance and said “I bet he doesn’t have the stomach to try that again.”
- How did the computer catch such a breeze? Someone left all of its windows open.
- A thief was caught stealing windows in the neighborhood. When the police questioned him to find out what he was doing with all the windows, he said it was a real pane to describe.
- I came home to a broken window in my room today. It seems someone had used part of a brick to smash it from the street. I called the police but they said there wasn’t enough concrete evidence to catch the culprit.
- It was parents’ career day at my school today and I brought my dad. When asked why he chose to be a window cleaner for his career choice, he simply replied that it was the only job that he ever saw himself doing and he enjoyed reflecting on it.
- While renovating the bathroom, I accidentally knocked out the window. Later that evening, my techy girlfriend asked why the bathroom window was missing while we were getting ready for bed and I simply replied “oopsie poopsie, I accidentally uninstalled windows” and flicked off the light.
- The neighbor told me their window was smashed today. I asked them what happened and they said that someone used a potato to gain entry to the house, but the police suspect the evidence was planted.
- A curious boy sat alone in his room. Bored, he decided to throw his clock out the window, which hit his mom’s car. When she inevitably found the clock and came to ask the boy why his clock was in the driveway, he told her that he just wanted to see time fly.
- When we moved into our new house, my wife and I debated between curtains or blinds for the windows. She went away for the weekend and I decided to take the initiative and got curtains up on all of them. When she came home, she had blinds with her which she threw at me. I don’t get why she had to throw shade at me for my efforts.
- Mr. Gates and Mr. Schwarzenneger met at a celebrity gathering and Mr. Gates can’t help being curious if Schwarzenneger has upgraded to the latest version of windows. He approaches Arnold and asks pointedly if he has tried the new windows yet, to which Arnold replies “No not yet, I still love the old Vista baby!”
Go Be A Pane
Hopefully you found a few window jokes and window puns on this list that made you chuckle. If so, go off and start telling them to your friends and family!
Don’t worry about being annoying. It’s all in the name of humor.
If you know some other good jokes about windows that we might have missed, shoot them over to us. You can reach out to us through our contact page or on social media.