49 Funny Tractor Jokes & Puns You Absolutely Need To See

Tractor in a field

Funny tractor jokes and tractor puns never get boring. There’s just something about them that keeps you coming back for more!

Take a look at these and let us know what you think. We had a great time putting this list together!

  • I thought my neighbor was a magician when his tractor turned into a field.
  • What do you do when an old tractor’s wheels fall off? Retire it.
  • How can you tell you have a magic tractor? It can turn into a field.
  • What did the farmer say after losing his tractor? I think I have a gambling problem.
  • What’s big, red in color, and would kill you if it fell from a tree? A tractor.
  • How can you get a farmer to like you? Try to a tractor.
  • What do you call a reality show for farmers? X-Tractor.
  • What is green and deadly if it gets stuck in your teeth? A tractor.
  • What do all farmers have in common? They’re pro tractor.
  • What did the criminal tell the farmer after stealing his tractor? Sorry, you’ve been cropped.
  • How did the farmer make his crop circles perfectly round? A protractor.
  • When is a tractor no longer a tractor? When it turns into a barn.
  • Did you see the new movie Tractor? No? What about the trailer?
  • What do you call someone who loves tractors? Protractors.
  • A farmer rode past my house, yelling about the end of the world. I guess it was Farmer Geddon.
  • What do you call a tractor waiting for pedestrians to cross the street? A crop yield.
  • What did the farmer say after his tractor broke down? That’s the last straw.
  • My boss asked me to look at pictures of his new tractor. I told him that’s not really my field.
  • I used to love tractors, but I don’t like them as much anymore. You can call me an extractor fan.
  • What’s louder than a tractor? 2 tractors.
  • Have you heard about the new tractor movie? It’s got a great trailer.
  • How did the family find their missing cow? They tractor down.
  • What do you call a robot that can turn into a tractor? A transfarmer.
  • What do you call a tractor that sells medicine? A farm assist.
  • Why was the cow upset with the tractor after the race? He was moooving faster than him.
  • What does an alien use to harvest their crops? Tractor beams.
  • What did the tractor say to the bicycle? I’m kind of a big wheel around here.
  • What do you call a farmer whose tractor dies while harvesting? Someone who’s outstanding in his field.
  • What do you call a beautiful tractor? A tractor.
  • Why did the farmer bring spools of thread on his tractor rides? He heard it was a sowing machine.
  • My dad traded our tractor for a bunch of seagulls. He’s so gull-able.
  • What do you call a tractor that turns into a field? A magic tractor.
  • What does a farmer say when he loses his tractor? Hey, where’s my tractor?
  • What do you call someone who hates tractors? An extractor fan.
  • What do you call a farmer who owns a bunch of tractors? A protractor.
  • My friend’s wife left him for a tractor salesman. She sent him a John Deere letter.
  • Did you hear what the tractor tire said to the bicycle tire? I’m a pretty big wheel.
  • Did you hear about the party they threw at the tractor-trailer weigh station? It was a large scale celebration.
  • What do you call a farmer who trades his tractor for a seagull? Gull-able.
  • Why couldn’t the dolphin get in the house? He was driving a tractor.
  • My dad asked me if I had seen the new movie “tractor.” I said, “no, but I’ve seen the trailer.”
  • Why was the tractor taking college classes? He wanted to become a farm assist.
  • How did the farmer find his missing dog? He tractor down.
  • I just purchased a new ant farm, but I’m not sure where to find a tractor that small.
  • I’ve never driven a tractor before. So, I was confused when my teacher handed me a protractor.
  • Have you heard of the farmer who rides his tractor screaming about the end of the world? His name’s Farmer Geddon.
  • How do farmers in space handle their cattle? A tractor beam.

Any Favorites?

If there were any funny tractor jokes or puns on this list that you loved in particular, share them with other people! And don’t forget to say where you found them.

And if you’re a handy farmer who knows some others that we didn’t include, send them to us. We take submissions all the time!