37 Coconut Puns & Jokes That Are Actually Funny

A funny looking coconut that has been cracked open

Funny coconut puns and coconut jokes are timeless. There’s so much to like about these fruits when it comes to finding humor. They’re goofy-looking, they have a hilarious name, and they’re universally recognized!

Putting together this list of coconut puns and jokes was a lot of fun. We can’t wait to tell them on our next tropical vacation!

  • How do coconuts measure distance at sea? They use coco-nautical miles.
  • What do you get when you mix spice with coconut? Coconut-meg!
  • How do palm trees grow so tall? They have a healthy supply of coconut-rients.
  • What do you get when you cross a snake with a coconut? A copra!
  • What did the cocoa bean say to the chef? “I’m coco for coconut!”
  • How do you tell a good coconut from a bad coconut? The bad ones are coco-naughty!
  • I heard a little boy asking his mom where coconut milk comes from while I was in the grocery store today. Without skipping a beat, the kid’s mom said “From Cow-conuts son.”
  • What do you call a fruit traveling through space? A coco-naut!
  • Where do coconuts go to get a drink while traveling around the galaxy? They go to the Milky Way!
  • What question should coconuts never ask each other? Got milk?
  • Why did the coconut stop in the middle of the rolling competition? Because it ran out of juice.
  • Two coconuts got into a bad accident at the beach today. It was a terrible piña collide-a!
  • How does a psychic use coconuts to predict the future? They read the palms!
  • Why do coconuts make terrible comedians? Because they always crack themselves up.
  • What is considered the strangest, goofiest, oddest, or most bizarre fruit in the world? A coco-nut!
  • What do coconuts and alphabet soup have in common? They both have the letter O in them.
  • What do you call the bottom of a coconut? The cocobutt!
  • What is the one thing that can scare a coconut out of its shell? Having a bounty placed on them!
  • What is round, wears sunglasses and is covered in brown hair? A coconut at the beach.
  • My friend will never say that onions are the only food item that can make a person cry again. He still has the welt on his forehead from the coconut I threw at him.
  • How did the big tree calm the little tree that was freaking out about the tropical storm hitting the beach? The big tree told the little tree to palm down and have a coconut.
  • Why was the coconut so sad? Because after it opened up it felt empty inside.
  • Why are the coconuts always out of money? Because they are constantly milked dry.
  • What is the easiest way to eliminate an opponent with a coconut allergy? Just place a bounty on their head.
  • What do you call someone that likes to consume hot chocolate every day of the year? A cocoa-nut!
  • If a coconut has no money, what do you call it? A broke-o-nut!
  • What is the alternate name for coconut milk? Coconut Tea!
  • What do you call two palm trees that have become tangled together when they were growing? A coco-knot.
  • What did the coconut say to the pineapple when they met in the punch bowl? “I think we blend well together, don’t you?”
  • Why was the sick coconut not allowed into the restaurant? Because it was full of coco-snot.
  • What do you call a super famous coconut? Nut-orious!
  • How do palm trees stay up to date with current events? They subscribe to coconut-ifications!
  • What do you call a warrior who has got completely nuts? A coco-knight!
  • When the ballet came to town, everyone attended except the coconuts. They were terrified of the Nutcracker.
  • What is the biggest difference between parrots and toucans? A parrot can’t take off with a coconut, but a toucan.
  • What should you do once you finish putting the lime into the coconut? Shake it all up, turn it around and give it to someone that wants to drink it of course.
  • How do two palm trees greet each other when they first meet? They in-tree-duce themselves to each other.
  • I was having coffee in the hotel lounge when someone sat down a few seats down and ordered a piña colada. Curious, I asked them what they enjoyed most about the beverage, to which they replied “It’s like sending my tastebuds to the Caribbean. I figure one of us deserves to feel like they are on vacation.”

Did These Crack You Up?

We hope you had some fun reading all of these funny coconut puns and coconut jokes. Some of our favorite puns of all time are on this list!

If you know any others that you think we should add, send them our way. We often accept submissions from our readers.