The great thing about funny bus jokes and bus puns is that they’re relatable and easy to bring up. It doesn’t matter who you are or where you live, you see buses all the time!
This list of bus jokes and puns will give you a chuckle the next time you see these long vehicles lumbering by. Or if you’re stuck on one next to someone who smells, it might be enough to get you through the suffering!
- What type of bus crossed the ocean? Columbus.
- Why did the bus driver quit his job? It was driving him to madness.
- What job can get you fired for going the extra mile? Bus driver.
- Why did the bus stop in the middle of the street? It saw a zebra crossing.
- Is the city bus running on time? No, it’s running on diesel.
- Today was a rough day. First, my ex was hit by a bus. Then, I lost my job as a bus driver!
- What superhero takes public transportation to get around? Bus Lightyear.
- What’s the hardest part about working as a bus driver? Everyone’s talking right behind your back.
- I got fired after giving up my seat on the bus for someone. I guess you can’t do that when you’re the bus driver.
- I couldn’t get my refrigerator to work today. I had to take the bus instead.
- How do eels travel across the seafloor? By Octo-bus.
- Where do bus drivers eat their lunches? In a traffic jam.
- What is yellow, and doesn’t know how to swim? A school bus.
- I hopped on the bus yesterday afternoon. After a few minutes, the driver asked me to sit down like everyone else.
- Why can’t the kids take the school bus to school? It wouldn’t fit through the door.
- Which end of the bus should passengers get off at the end of their ride? It doesn’t matter, both ends stop.
- What happened to the man who ran in front of the bus? He got tired.
- Did you hear all the buses are stopping today? It’s to let passengers off.
- Is the bus running on time? No, it runs on wheels.
- What did the bus say to the frog? Hop on.
- Bus ticket inspectors: You’ve really got to hand it to them.
- My brother always goes the extra mile at work. That’s why he was fired from his job as a bus driver.
- What’s the most important part of an electric bus? The conductor.
- Why did the bat miss his bus ride home? He was too busy hanging around.
- Will the bus stop by the river? Well, if it doesn’t, there’s going to be a huge splash.
- Why do school bus drivers have to stop at all railway crossings? That’s how they were trained.
- I just installed a trampoline on a musician’s tour bus. I guess you can say they’re jumping on the bandwagon.
- What’s the difference between a cake and a city bus?
I don’t know.
Then I’m glad I didn’t send you to pick out my birthday cake.
- What are the benefits of city buses using green fuel? They’ll always be on thyme.
- What type of game does a monster play on the school bus? Squash.
- What did Harry Potter do when the Hogwarts Express broke down? He grabbed a ride on the magic school bus.
- What do you get when you combine a skunk with King Kong? Someone who doesn’t have to fight for a bus seat.
- My awful day started when I fell asleep on the school bus this morning. What makes it worse is that I was the one driving.
- What’s the difference between a school bus driver and a winter cold? One knows all the stops, and the other stops the nose.
- I landed my dream job today! An expensive company car and a view of the city. I love being a bus driver.
- A man was struggling to get onto the bus, but it was so full people kept pushing him out.
“Why should we let you on!” the passengers shouted. “It’s too full!”
“Because I’m the bus driver,” the man shouted back.
“Can this city bus take me to New York?”
“All of me!”
- What’s the difference between a school bus and a birthday dinner?
I don’t know.
Then I’m glad I didn’t send you to pick up my order.
- Passenger: One ticket to New York, please.
Bus Driver: By way of Buffalo?
Passenger: No, by bus!
We hope these funny bus jokes and bus puns resonated with you. It’s always nice to have some of these in mind the next time you need to ride in one (or are stuck behind one in traffic).
If you know any other good bus jokes and puns, let us know! We’ll add whichever ones we like.